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My Corner of the Forest


DarkRowan
Back to Journal Jamboree
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Sep 4th, 2002 10:02 pm - Pacific Time Journal
Body tired, but mind willing to post

I hate heat. Being as big as I am, I exude enough heat as is. This weather here is killing me. I'm driving home today and pass by OC Fairgrounds and it tells me its 81 degrees. At 5:20 pm, when it’s cloudy. This is not fun. Only thing worse is Texas this time of the year. Last time I was there (FYI: most of my extended family, both sides, lives in some part of Texas) it was raining at 91 degrees in the summer. It was hot rain, not the refreshing kind.

Anyways back to the head. I have a hard time sleeping in heat. That’s why my hair is usually short: I get insomnia from the heat retention of long (normal length for guys) hair. So for the past 2 nights I have had no sleep. I had to take a nap today after work just to catch up. I yawned up at work so much people noticed. Not to mention I had to (with the help of my 2nd Dustin) to build a cabinet in the evening. Basically, from 1:30 to 5 pm I was overworked. I’m good at it, but I don’t like doing it.

Side note: Dance Dance Revolution is addictive. I finally got a Dance Pad and I am actually using workout mode to (possibly, I hope fugging so) get in shape. Really. Addictive.

Updated September 05th, '02 9:36am ( 0 ) Comments

Sep 1st, 2002 8:47 pm - Pacific Time Journal
The HEAT!!!! *fries*

OMG... it was so hot today. I swear I have not felt heat like this in years. It was 85ish at the coast. That’s hot for us. So what do I decided to do? I go the Orange International Street Fair with my sister. Inland. Boy what a fugging mistake that was. No... not fugging. Plain f****ing stoopid!

Oh well. I haven't been to the Street Fair in, what, 10 years (Lots of hate from when I and my mother worked it). The hate, thankfully, doesn't run as deep in my as does hers. Anyhoot: It was nice. I got to try for the first time a Doc-a-rita. Basically it’s a slushy Doc's Hard Lemonade. Very tasty. The fair itself has so much food; it’s hard to go through the list of it all.

While there, my sister and stumbled upon a stand selling Olive oil, Balsamic Vinegar, and Olives. Tastiest stuff you have ever known. We bought some, when got pasta, bread, and salad and had a feast when we got home. That was the better part of the experience.

The heat was hell though.


Updated September 02nd, '02 8:25am ( 0 ) Comments

Aug 31st, 2002 11:31 pm - Pacific Time Gibberish
Pink Dip, a recipie

Mix one 16 oz package of cream cheese with 1 1/2 cups Picante sause (Pace works best). Soften cream cheese (aids mixing) in a bowl. Add in 1/3 of the Picante sauce, and start to blend (it helps if you have a hand mixer... lemmie tell you its hard to do the first third by hand, like I did tonight >_<). When compleatly incorperated, but the next third of the mixture in and do the same. Lather, rinse, repeat with the last third. Serve with torrilla chips.

Updated September 01st, '02 10:35am ( 0 ) Comments

Aug 30th, 2002 7:02 pm - Pacific Time Journal
Goddess, why did this happen again???

Why is when I buy software, I get good stuff. But when I go for the hardware I completely screw up??

Case in point: I bought an all-in-one printer (print/copy/scan) yesterday at Target. What can I say, it was on sale ^_^. Here's the kicker: No power cord... no USB connector. I can understand the second, since it does not need to be connected to the comp to work, but power cord???

Ok... second stupid thing I've done because of this: I just came back from Fry's Electronics (Watches TCC cringe with hate ^_^) to at least get a power supply. Well, I've got an AC adapter... but it won’t work with this damm thing. *growls* So I may just end up taking the thing back and getting a new one that HOPEFULLY will have the power cord.

This same s*** happened when I got my new comp. It was a kinda closed door deal. I got a nice refurbished (read: used like new) comp and it just went wacked on me: It kept crashing for no apparent reason. And I had a hella fun time getting back to the guy I bought it from (through middle man Coworker) to get the damm thing fixed. At least the zip drive I got worked ok.

Other than that: I got to leave a half-hour early today. Kim, head high mistress of staffing/slave labor, called me up (or, actually, it was the receptionist upstairs putting me through to her after a PA over the office loud speakers that nearly made me s*** my pants... why do they have to be so LOUD!) NEways, Kim was all nice but she told me "I'm coming down in 10 minutes, and you better be gone... buster." *Blink* I know she was somewhat kidding, but it was weird. And I know she was serious about the 10 mins, because my 2nd, Dustin, came down 5 mins later and told me that there was 5 mins to go. He had been in her office at the time of the call. Nice.

Updated August 31st, '02 6:20am ( 0 ) Comments

Oct 31st, 1979 1:03 pm - Pacific Time Journal
In the beggining...

<<I'm testing out the date feature here. If it works, this will show up as the day and time I was born: Halloween, 1979, 1:04pm, Bakersfield, CA>>

This is a great day for me. First I get slapped on my wet chilled ass, and then I turn blue because of a heart murmur (which, if you don't know, is when a heart valve doesn't work right and causes a back flow). Dammit, why can’t all my parts work right? And why am I so frugging heavy?? I want my mommy!!!!

The doctor told my mother that the only thing he delivered on Halloween was warlocks. By warlock he meant boys, but the name became kind of befitting in the end. Though I’d prefer the term witch to that ^_^.

Yep… I actually feel that I was born pagan. Hell, I’m born on a pagan holiday (Sam Hain… say ‘Sow-in’ to be correct. Thank you ^_^). The first part of my life was spent in somewhat of a belief void. I had none in higher powers. I did understand that I though differently. I understood that the ways of the world seemed to change the way I wanted it if I ‘whished’ it hard enough. Coincidence it was not: Too many times did I have flashes of pure intuition or just things going my way, which helped in many cases.

Namely my sanity when I lived in Anaheim Hills, CA. From here on, we shall just refer this as to Hell. Really, that’s what I still call it. I hate the place I lived. Moreover, I hated (and still, deep down, hate) those I grew up with. Because of my size, I was picked on (Really, really, really picked on). I have seen so much crap in my time; I have a rather hard shell. It’s difficult at times to take even a compliment, seeing as my natural defense, if you will, is to let is just slide off of me… like rain on glass. Most of it doesn’t stay on me for long. I have had to learn in recent years to take words like that to heart; else I piss off the person giving the donation.

Getting back to the subject: Hell was just that: Hell. Ever feel the sting after having a rock being thrown at your head. I have, numerous times. I hated going to school. The only people I ever made friends with were (in order of appearance in my life) Joey, Kevin, Brian, Tyler, Dee, and Danny. Also in order of appearance, for nicknames now: Rogue, Spider, Captain, Too Tall, Deez Nutz, and Bugeyes. (Lovely names, ne?) I personally had several nicknames: Sandman, S**tface, Knight, fatass, Jeffy (note the lack of ‘re’ there. I hated getting called Jeffrey. Very annoying even today) and others too numerous to mention (and very hard to read with all the *’s in the way ^_^). I had many unusual friends. Other acquaintances included Shorty and his sister, Alien. Really, I had a f***ed up time. Ever wonder why I am so weird?

My salvation came in the form of moving. Had I stayed in Hell, I would be a very different person today. If I lived this long (did I mention that I happen to know so much about poisons from all the times I researched how to kill myself?). I found a new home and new friends. This time, nicknames were out. Brian, Marc, Jamie and such. I had more friends there. And even more crushes.

Oh crushes, how do I love thee let me count the ways. I’ve had so many, I’ve lost track. Some of the more memorable ones have become friends I chat to every once in a while. But in the friend category only one has stayed with me: Me bud Brian. BIIIIIG Brian. BB was 6’1” 350lbs when I met him freshman year of high school. I have been though more misadventures with this guy that some friggin cartoon chara.

All of this while my mothers health had deteriorated. My first real memories of her were with her crutch. Arthritis had already set in. Then a back injury really messed things up. Now, since I was 15, she has been confined to a wheelchair. She pops more pills than a drug addict. My father has sunken into a raged depression over time because of this. He’s an old boy’s club type man: Women are supposed to be barefoot, pregnant, and cooking dinner before the husband gets home. He lives in the past, I live in the present.

Past that my 2 sisters cannot be more different. We 3 siblings are each 5 years apart, with Shawna taking the lead over Crystal, but only in age. Sha is a person who lives best when under supervision of family. She has been in more hole in the wall rats nest that a hooker. Her son, Ken, has taken to this and had a parole officer assigned to him at the tender age of 10. Black sheep, anyone? Crystal has faired better, though somewhat as bad in some cases. After 2 kids (Evan and Elliott) and now 3 failed marriages, she is now living at home with me. She has become hardened but not cruel and mean. That’s a good thing. She is a good friend to me. That’s a good thing too ^_^.

Now days I have come full circle with myself, accepting my past as it is, and looking towards the future. I work a mailroom job for a rather busy Sales and marketing firm. I just got a car a month ago, and am looking to move out of my home with my sister Crystal as a roommate. And I’m looking around to date again *shimmies eyebrows*.

Man… that’s a long first post. I’m tired. Anyone got a Long Island Ice Tea handy?


Updated September 17th, '03 7:14am ( 0 ) Comments

Jan 12th, 1940 12:56 am - Pacific Time Journal
Happy ******* new year

Lemmie see if I can give a basic rundown of events for the past 30 days for me.

First my sister lost her job at the Radio station. They laid off her and more than a few other people who were making money. Best bets are on a sale of the station, bases on emails sent in and around that time.

'But Wait! There's more!' I did not have a happy new years. I got sick. Bronchitis, and a rather bad case of it at that. In fact, I still have it. Went to the doctors, and got an antibiotic, antihistamine (Benadryll only stronger), and an Inhaler... like you'd see on someone with Asthma. Thats how bad I feel at the moment. Sleep is not easy for me at all, with my coughing keeping me up half the night.

Then my mother has to be sick as well. But I will make light of it considering she's in an electric wheelchair (since I was 15)... She's got more important things to think about.


All of which leads to my most happiest thought: My father. He's in the hospital. Cellutitis, def: Infection of the soft tissues. 2 places on my fathers foot have gone from fire red to purple. He had to admitted to the hospital yesterday. He, right now, is so close.... no, I dare not think that. NO.

*wipes tears from eyes* He has trouble breathing, coughs a lot. Sleep, even in the hospital right now, is hard for him. I haven't had a chance to visit yet, but I will soon. Hopefully he will be out in 4-5 days. But even then, he might not be back to work for a month!!! Given the above (Sister out of work, mom gets a small check from SS), I will be the only one with a substantial income for a while.... unless my sister finds a job.


Sorry if this sounds like a sob story. I just need to get it into writing.

Updated January 12th, '03 11:57pm ( 0 ) Comments

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